How (to win)  = Will + Resolve + Discipline?

This last part, always my heart’s weakest, as well as my mind’s, the connection together being what can only bring de-play-sin?  I know I can strengthen this connection through yoga and meditation, but it’s exactly my desire for these two techniques that leads me to my search for discipline.

I’ve always been able to work well as a team, but all one is tough, and though I certainly have teammates currently (thank you!), it seems I walk my path of discipline alone. How can I always be a disciple of love and always the right kind, which is the biggest trick for the mind, and heart?

Maitreya was born in London, Pennsylvania, Brazil, which is right next to the small town of Beijing, Australia, Africa and not too far from the white shores of Antarctica. The whiteness of Maitreya’s skin at birth was only as white as the blackness of a bright white light, but the darkness of his skin was also only as dark as the whiteness of a dark black dot that often serves as a period to the end of a sentence. Maitreya’s mother was like most mothers – caring and worrying about her child at every moment and through her love and his fathers’ lack of love Maitreya had the childhood everyone should have. It’s not so much that Maitreya’s father did not love him per se, but rather that he did not love him in the way his mother did and if he had than Maitreya would not have been allowed to be free at all. He would have ended up locked in to whatever beliefs and existence his overbearing and overpowering parents would have forced him into. Thankfully though, Tree was able to go out and climb trees on his own at a young age despite his mother’s worry about his poor bones, because his father was a minor sage of his own.
Tree wasn’t perfect, as no one is, but he never set out to hurt anyone, as no one ever usually does. It’s always just a messy thing called desire that ends up causing pain, conflicting lines of flight that take one wavicle away from another and leave that separate wavicle scared and alone and therefore hurt. What tree didn’t understand though, and desired to change, is why other wavicles wanted to keep him limited without letting him explore all that the world had to offer. He wondered, why are there people out there telling others what to do: what they should do, what they “can” or “can’t ”do”, telling others what God to believe in, what’s “right” and what’s “wrong”, and basically demanding of tree and others to walk a path someone somewhere at some time considered straight and narrow. Tree saw the value to some of these statements but the underlying purpose to all of it just seemed absolutely ridiculous; D.H. Lawrence knows this, all authority IS absolutely ridiculous; that is, except for the authority of creation, which we all share. As I am author here of this living breathing wavicle, I am a creator equal to whatever creator created me. It wasn’t my moms and pops; though they certainly helped to form the creation of myself, all these events were set in motion at the beginning of the first movement of the first creation which is too infinitely amazing to even ponder since time is likely eternal and likely never is in the first place.
Tree was most upset about that word “can’t” and the possibilities it limits along with the fear it creates. As author here, I don’t want to limit any possibilities and truthfully, the only thing one perhaps “can’t” ever actually do in real life is limit possibilities. One never knows what circumstances may change, so any usage of can’t is a lie. If one were to say the moon can’t be as bright as the sun, it may be true some day and false the other and the logic of can’t is the logic of can. As for canting possibili-tease, we always decide what we can or “can’t” (blah ) create. Tree was fearless in his war against cant and wanted to see humanity flourish in every possible way. What would Christ have done if people told him he can’t rise from the dead? He probably would have laughed, and so Jesus Maitreya Catan laughed as well. After all, Imagination is not a state but the human existence itself. Kant knew this very well.
Imagination, Creation, Judgment, Perception, Creation, Evolution, Love, Light, Imagination, Reason, Life, Imagination, Love, Creation, all are the same. All are Imagination and fall under the realm of Imagination. What we perceive is all, according to Kant’s layout of existence, perceived within space and time, but truthfully, as modern physics now shows us, how we perceive space and/or time depends on the perspective we choose within our own creative force of Imagination. If I choose to be a meditative Buddhist looking out at the world before me, I may see all time as present now and all space as infinite molecular light emanating from source. No one can ever know another’s perception and therefore all classification and all judgment is always ultimately imagination. Therefore, there should be no judgment or classification, merely let things be freely and express yourself however you desire and get rid of any idea in your head that relates to the word can’t.
Kant knew that the golden rule shows that we are God(s). It is only through our own subjective experience that we exist in the world and it is only through our subjective experience that we can act.

I found my key,

Within the ground.

Found my Ratdke,

He reminded me,

To take from the crown.

I’ve been working up earthly,

Which is as needs be;

But for me to turn down,

That within beastly,

That eats away at me,

I’ve got to see the crown.

Not yours, my queen,

But that unseen,

Loving source around;

That crown that’s been,

Since word has been,

To which we all bow down.

This key came from the ground:

The wobbly dubstep sound,

That has found G3t D0wn.

G3t D0wn to the ground,

That Muladhara sound,

And love our earth.

“For Once the sin against God was the greatest sin;

But God died, and these sinners died with him.

To sin against the earth is now the most dreadful thing,

and to esteem the entrails of the unknowable higher

than the meaning of the earth…”

For I love the earth,

And will not rest,

Until I know

That golden key unlocks.

We shall learn what wonderful things

were lying in that box.

But still I believe you to be heaven sent.

The pain I’ve suffered for my only desire,

The endless refrain in my head,

The thoughts that constantly ceaselessly tire,

Here was a chance to make them dead.

A lukewarm lesson leads me nowhere,

And endless discussion with good friends;

No hope but return to my heart’s fare

In chance to find the means to my ends.

This golden light I seek,

So achingly out of reach;

There is a key to cure my weak physique,

But this, only you can teach.

Work, work, work, my soul speaks,

But is it luck that will only decide?

What could be the correct technique

To resolve this ridiculous ride?

Paths multiplying, and plans awry,

Obstacles obfuscating, love wanting to die,

I search my soul to speculate why,

But only hear a rational reply:

“She has hurt you,

She is not worth it.”

But I have promised,

How could I commit?

I can’t take my back my word,

For never to you may I lie,

Fate’s irony full, it seems,

Of bountiful supply.

Now the ridiculous riddle

Has my wondering how

To both try and forget you,

Yet never break my vow.

I forget in order to allow

Love to bloom if it tries,

I trust to be happy even if

This long-living Lotus dies.

The beginning of “Of the Refrain” in A Thousand Plateaus: Capitalism and Schizophrenia:

I. A child in the dark, gripped with fear, comforts himself by singing under his breath. He walks and halts to his song. Lost, he takes shelter, or orients himself with his little song as best he can. The song is like a rough sketch of a calming and stabilizing, calm and stable, center in the heart of chaos. Perhaps the child skips as he sings, hastens or slows his pace. But the song itself is already a skip: it jumps from chaos to the begininngs of order in chaos and is danger of breaking apart at any moment. There is always sonority in Ariadne’s thread. Or the song of Orpheus.

II. Now we are at home. But the home does not preexist: it was necessary to draw a circle around that uncertain and fragile center, to organize a limited space. Many, very diverse, components have a part in this, landmarks and marks of all kinds. This was already true of the previous case.  But now the components are used for organizing a space, not for the momentary determination of a center.  The forces of chaos are kept outside as much as possible, and the interior space protects the germinal forces of a task to fulfill or a deed to do.  This involves an activity of selection, elimination and extraction, in order to prevent the interior forces of the earth from being submerged, to enable them to resist, or even take something from chaos across the filter or sieve of the space that has been drawn.  Sonorous or vocal components are very important: a wall of sound, or at least a wall with sonic bricks in it. A child hums to summon the strength for the schoolwork she has to hand in.  A housewife sings to herself, or listens to the radio, as she marshals the antichaos forces of her work.  Radios and territories (the neighbor complains when it gets too loud). For sublime deeds like the foundation of a city or the fabrication of a golem, one draws a circle, or better yet walks in a circle as in a children’s dance, combining rhythmic vowels and consonants that correspond to the interior forces of creation as to the differentiated parts of an organism.  A mistake in speed, rhythm, or harmony would be catastrophic because it would bring the forces of chaos, destroying both creator and creation.

III. Finally, one opens the circle a crack, opens it all the way, lets someone in, calls someone, or else goes out oneself, launches forth.  One opens the circle not on the side where the old forces of chaos press against it but in another region, one created by the circle itself.  As though the circle tended on its own to open onto a future, as a function of the working forces it shelters.  This time, it is in order to join with the forces of the future, cosmic forces.

Disc 1: http://www.megaupload.com/?d=RIIREYNP
Disc 2: http://www.megaupload.com/?d=5HDGWZD1

Revised a little from last year, though nowhere near as much as I had hoped… It is tracked now though.

Tracklist

Disc 1:

1: “Revolution 2009″
The Beatles “Revolution 9 (pt. 1)”
The Field “From Here We Go Sublime”
Eilje Klein (mix(essential))
David Byrne “Tiny Apocalypse”
Nine Inch Nails “The Beginning of the End”
Amon Tobin “Straight Pysche”
Allman Brothers Band “In Memory of Elizabeth Reed”
Bjork “Earth Intruders (Lexx Remix)”
Astral Projection “Searching for UFOs”
V “Burma (Sasha Mix)”
Daft Punk “Revolution 909″

2: “Emotions Should Be Free”
The Beatles “Revolution 9 (pt. 2)” (9 min. mark)
311 “Beautiful Disaster”
Shpongle “Levitation Nation”
Hawton/Villolobos (essential mix)
Bassnectar “Verbing the Noun”
Brazilian Girls “Die Gedanken Sind Frei (Thoughts Are Free)”
Joe Meek and the Blue Men “I Hear A New World”
Mike Gordon and Leo Kottke “Sweet Emotions”
Aerosmith “Sweet Emotions”

3: “Cheshire Awareness”
The Beatles “Revolution 9 (pt. 3)
Disco Biscuits “Basis For A Day”
Shpongle (Alice in Wonderland (02 mix))
Shpongle “Once Upon A Sea of Blissful Awareness (Deep Version)”
Shpongle “Outer Shpongolia”
The Clash “Revolution Rock”
Shpongle “When Shall I Be Free?” (23 min. mark)
Built to Spill “Center of the Universe”

4: “Binghamton Breakdown”
The Beatles “Revolution 9 (pt. 4)”
Red Hot Chili Peppers “Throw Away Your Television”
Booka Shade “Friend For A Night”
Daft Punk “Brainwasher”
Disco Biscuits “Gangster Jam”
Future Sound of London “Papau New Guinea Translation 5 The Great Marmalade Mama
In the Sky”
Led Zeppelin “Communication Breakdown”
Gun’s N’ Roses “Civil War”
Pink Floyd “The Trial”
John Lennon “Give Peace A Chance”

5: “Where’s the Love?”
The Beatles “Revolution 9 (pt. 5)”
Bjork “All Is Full of Love”
Beck “Hell Yes (Ghettochip Malfunction)”
Tipper “Veil Lifter”
2pac “Changes”
Beastie Boys “Pass the Mic”
Bob Dylan “Maggie’s Farm (live)”

6: “Our Parents Created the 60′s”
The Beatles “Revolution 9 (pt. 6)”
Caspa and Russo Essential Mix (Noise Disorganizer) (40 min. ish?)
Glitch Mob Mix by DJ Yogurt, MC Rev (artsier)
Bob Marley “Soul Shakedown Party”
William S. Burroughs “Is Everybody In?”
!!! “Bend Over Beethoven”
Prometheus “Arcadia Majick”
Paul Oakenfield (Goa mix)
Hallucinogen “LSD”

Disc 2:

6.9: “Summer of Love (69′) Reprise”
Hallucinogen “LSD (World On a String Mix)”
Hallucinogen “LSD”
Phish “Back On the Train (2/21/03)”
Frank Zappa “Trouble Everyday”
Prometheus “Arcadia Magick”
U2 “Numb (New Mix)”
Phish “Back On the Train”

7: “M0nks G3t D0wn, M0nks, M5k3 L0v3″
The Beatles “Revolution 9 (pt. 7)”
Phish “Headphones Jam”
The Field “A Paw In the Face”
Manu Chao “Otro Mundo”
Tipper “Hobbledehoy”
Medeski Martin and Wood “End of the World Party”
John Coltrane “A Love Supreme, Pt. 2: Resolution”
Ott “Ott Meets Billy the Kid”
Miles Davis “Pharoah’s Dance”

8: “2008″
The Beatles “Revolution 9 (pt. 8)”
The Disco Biscuits “And the Ladies Were the Rest of the Night (4/12/08)”
Sebestian Leger Essential Mix
Sound Tribe Sector Nine “Somesing”
Depeche Mode “Told You So”
Younger Brother “Psychic Gibbon”
Parliamen Funkadelic “Mothership Connection”
Velvet Underground “New Age”
Dave Matthews Band “Dancing Nancies”
Violent Femmes “I’m Nothing”
Pork Tornado “All-American”
Chris Berry and Panjea “Panjea”
Radiohead “Stop Whispering (live)”
Paul Van Dyk “Love From Above”
Disco Biscuits “Frog Legs”
Hallucinogen “Mi-Loony-Um (Floating Butterfly Stings like a Bee)”
Sebestian Leger Essential Mix
Tipper “Hobbledehoy”
Bjork “Dull Flame of Desire (Modeselektor Mix for Girls)”
Deadmaus “Brazil”
Ott “Queen of All Everything”
Thievery Corporation “Focus On Sight”
The Who “The Seeker”
Shpongle “…And Day Turned Into Night”

9: “2009″
The Beatles “Revolution 9 (pt. 9)”
Daft Punk “Revolution 909″
Yonder Mountain String Band “Legalize It”
Tool “The Pot”
Jack Johnson “It’s All Understood”
Spoon “The Underdog”
The Beatles “Revolution 1”
The Beatles “Cry Baby Cry”
Booka Shade “Mandarine Girl”
DJ Logic “French Quarter”
Benga “Crunked Up”
Disco Biscuits “Float Like A Butterfly”
Radiohead “Stop Whispering (live)”
The Klaxons “Gravity’s Rainbow (Soulwax Remix)”
Grateful Dead “And We Bid You Goodnight”
Phish “Revolution 9″ (10/31/94)
Bob Marley “Redemption Song”
Daft Punk “Revolution 909″

“Emancipate yourselves from mental slavery;
None but ourselves can free our mind.
Wo! Have no fear for atomic energy,
‘Cause none of them-a can-a stop-a-the time.

How long shall they kill our prophets,
While we stand aside and look?
Yes, some say it’s just a part of it:
We’ve got to fulfill the book.

Won’t you help to sing
These songs of freedom? -
’cause all I ever had:
Redemption songs -
All I ever had:
Redemption songs:
These songs of freedom,
Songs of freedom.”

- Prophet Mr. Marley

Mayakovsky

I

M

Trying

To listen                                                                      to my heart.

It was the best failure possible.  I set out to enjoy some music and some art and some love and what I received was far greater than anything I could have imagined and certainly far greater than any planned event of any proportion could ever bring to anyone.  You see, I was entirely in love and I guess maybe obsessed with this amazing raver chick with bubbling energy and the prettiest blue eyes and the best smile I’ve ever seen, but then I took off one weekend to a concert a little farther away from home then I would have liked.  I expected the music and the people to be wonderful and I wasn’t mistaken as I met this amazing brown eyed student.

This student was the most courageous, fearless, and graceful beauty I’ve ever met in my entire life and I’ve met some pretty special people, of which certainly the aforementioned raver reaches near the top.  This student though, threw a wrench in all of my plans, and although I had her company for only one weekend, the connection that I felt has shaken my spirit into an awkward intense state bordering both on tremendous peace and tremendous confusion.  The raver chick was wonderful and I knew her for quite a while, and although I was still infatuated with her I had drifted out of her life and was working at a losing game attempting to win her back into my life, if even as just a friend, although the primary focus was admittedly for my own selfish future hopes of love and a life together.

I don’t think my plans were selfish though.  I somehow had the bright idea to form a necessary path to this raver that involved 12 other women, totaling 13, or 26, perhaps I got a bit greedy, but what can I say, I love everyone and I know anything is possible and my end goal was not even just this raver, but transformation, the Mayan symbol of which is of course 13.  What I wanted and want still is a total transformation of the world and a total transformation of love and desire and especially the way I love and desire.  The end goal for love for me is tantra and although silly me somehow thinks sex is the path to liberation, my recent skinchronicity revealed there’s more important mysteries at work and the work needs to be focused on the present and not a future culmination.  I apologize to my student for possibly appearing weak or reserved over the weekend but a possible bump in the road had me worried as I always wish to do no harm.

It was supposed to be that I would make 13 records, mixes, call them what you will, and have sexual success with the muses I musiced for, but I knew when making those plans that life is what happens when you make plans and life certainly made some plans for me this past weekend.  This student taught me so much and her dreams and words and reflection gave me more confidence in this world than I’ve ever had, although her actions at times were confusing.  One can never know another’s intentions or feelings and the actions I’ve received upon returning home make me wonder if it was all just a dream.  If it is all just a dream though, then this dream is my space that I create and I should be able to create the dream I wish to see.  What confuses me is this dream we call reality combined with my utter weakness in the face of the most beautiful aspect of the creator I have ever seen.

This student has certainly eased the forgetting of this past raver, and although I don’t know her feelings for me and I do know she needs to be free, I still believe there is work that needs to be done for all more importantly.  This student, despite her beauty, is also one of the most powerful people I’ve ever met and although again I doubt the devotion to love on her behalf, only because she hasn’t shown me love since I’ve returned home, I don’t doubt the potential our powers combined could unlock amongst the world.  A dreamer needs grounding and I’m still working on getting back to my own roots, but again it’s not about desire or something I feel I can do to help this woman; it is about desire to work with this woman in tearing shit down to the really true ground.  I write this love song to this student because I know we need to spread love and although I may be naïve, I always have nothing to lose and can always adapt.  We are all snakes shedding skin and our oboros is about to eat its own tail.  Everything is on track, nothing is wrong, but everything is right between us as I see it and for me to even think about giving up my prior focus shows me that I can’t miss this importance if I have any chance at all.

This past raver wooed me through conversation, but words are now enemies of mine and the more spiritual being we seek is a telepathic empathic one.  She wooed me with philosophy and feelings stronger than I’ve felt before, but this new door has me seeing red, even pink.  These new feelings I don’tq quite know yet, but I feel the emptiness being filled and the fire is now burning, burning not for myself but for man and the wo that makes life worthy.  My brown-eyed raver girl appreciated music, but not as much as my new student, who my experiences with have helped show me music’s greater resonations. Sex, drugs, and dubstep; love, initiation, and music.  Somehow this combo must be controlled and this scene needs leaders, two of whom I know my student and I can be.  I’m unaware where this world needs me to lead physically but I’m ready and willing to go where ever the spirit calls me and these words are shouts to help me find the way.  I’m in no hurry and really have nothing to say, only a call for others to listen to what is within and without, to be aware of the world’s whispers and the children’s cries.  We are beginning to wake up and this I have no doubt, but my most important lesson this summer has been to g3t l0ud3r and as I shout over the river I know the importance of this despite having nothing to say.  I can go anywhere and be my word, but I would love to be in the presence of this student, as she is truly the most beautiful aspect of divine creation I have ever confronted:  which was what I hoped to find during the Shpongle and Alex Grey set at Solstice after all anyway.  Such an epic failure whose outcome hasn’t been decided yet, for if it all was just a dream or a memory then it is nothing but a ghost that will fade, but if it is truly the beginning of the summer of love the world needs then it could quite be the greatest success the world has ever experienced.  This is the type of power I see in reach now and I don’t know if it takes two baby, but I do know that I have to shout to find out.

As I work ironically towards eliminating my self and attracting power, the one greatest question mark is drugs, or the initiation that is one of the three elements.  Of father, mother, child the drugs seem to be the child that needs instruction.  Our society’s infatuation with alcoholic intoxication eats away at my body, soul, and mind and I have a mind to change things and bring the cup of Maitreya back to the earth so we can have some true communion in the church of our hearts.  For proper initiations need shamans, and proper journeys need guides.  We all can act as shaman and guide, but we have work and focused connecting to do before we can journey safely and freely.  Too much is never enough, but too much of this poison has weakened our collective being to the point of apathy.  Lawrence notes that today “men upon the body of the earth are like lice, devouring the earth into sores” and these fat lazy fucks have forgotten how to take care of themselves through an irresponsible repression of proper initiation.  I digress here though, for I came to speak of love.

A lot of people use this word lightly and far too frequently, and I myself may have been guilty at times as well, but what I felt for this student and this raver are two cases of love that far outweigh all other experiences I’ve had with the term, maybe with the exception of the woman I was I with for seven years who I “loved” with all my heart… that love started too young before I knew what love could be, but this raver opened new possibilities of love, and this student now opens tremendous newer ones as well.  For she, you see, spoke of love willingly but gives love very hesitantly.  We are all guarded and afraid of love and I am as wounded as any, but the worst thing anyone can ever do is close their heart; something which I now recognize I may have been doing without knowing during my tunnel vision trip towards my raver Rachel.  My student now though has breathed new life and love and has certainly already given me all the energy and love I need to get by for the next phase of my life, but the love I seek is far greater than what’s been given and she knows this.  She knows how to love and she is afraid, afraid of the teacher I call myself perhaps, although I haven’t the faintest reason why.  My friendship love goes unaccepted while her stalker fear keeps me rejected.  Rachel’s weirdness and immaturity caused her fled but this new one I know knows love and can heal the dead.  We love our Cosmic Christ who rises from the dead within to bring the fifth dimension to the world, but I won’t see this beauty until all others are free.  I’m ready for whatever, stronger than you know, and as fearless as my student.  Please love me in whatever way listener, again I am in no hurry and have no intention other than to reside and work and play with you, for all work should be play, and the Marxist me is far too upset that too many are slaving away on Maggie’s Farm despite Bob Dylan’s messages and constant singing and shouting: an old man truly working hard for a new world that doesn’t quite have the energy that we do.  He needs some help.

Music, harmony, Mary land, mother earth, a chance, a dance, some trance, some love.  Do I chase a dream or do I sing?  I’m just trying to be me and bring harmony and there is some disconnect between you and I that I can’t understand because what I felt and perceived within you must be different from what you felt and perceived within me.  I see you as someone similar to me who would definitely be a blessing to my life, but I don’t know if you feel the same, and this goes for everyone and is at the heart of the musical matter of love.  See me as love.  See me as you.  See me as God.  Please listen to the music and the choir of your heart and respond in kind.

Love,

Teacher preacher mankind rewind.